Forever Never
by Sailor Seraphim
Summary: Duo POV... Duo thinks about what his relationship with Heero is like on a very unremarkable day. And they make a special promise... SHOUNEN AI 2+1


Forever Never  
A Gundam Wing Fanfic  
By:  
Sailor Seraphim  
  
  
  
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Author's Notes --  
  
I do not own Shin Kidosenki Gundam Wing or any of its related characters. If I did, the series would be chock-full of tasty shounen ai goodness. I do, however, own the situations which occur in this fic.  
  
SPOILERS for... urr, nothing really. General series knowledge, I suppose.  
  
WARNINGS for... shounen ai (2+1), some kissing and implications of more, WaFF, sap, and a good healthy helping of rambling since this is first-person from Duo's POV.  
  
Uhm... yeah. This bunny attacked me at 3 in the morning and I wrote nonstop until I finished it at 4 A.M.. Came shooting out of my fingertips and everything. It figures that the only way I actually write something *without* angst or insanity is when I'm up until hellish hours.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
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It was one of those days that you could forget, you know?   
  
The weather was sorta blah, nothing that would really stick out in your head. There wasn't some awe-inspiring thunderstorm rolling through, it wasn't amazingly hot, and it wasn't freeze-your-ass-off cold. Sure, the sky was blue, there were some fluffy white clouds, and it was warm, but you sorta expect that in the springtime, right?   
  
So it wasn't the most memorable of days.  
  
Hell, even the town we were in wasn't all that special. It wasn't some big city, with danger lurking around every corner. It wasn't a quaint rural place that was untouched by war. Actually, it was a suburb, probably a good 45 minute drive from the nearest big city. It had a mall, and lots of houses, and a public transportation system that wasn't all that shitty as long as you remembered to be waiting at least ten minutes beforehand.  
  
So it wasn't the most memorable of places.  
  
Now, I know what you're probably thinking. It was during the war: why was I letting my guard down? Shouldn't I be keeping a close watch, making sure no one noticed me from the wanted posters? Well... yeah. I'm not dumb. But even in a war -- maybe especially at times like this -- days just seem to flow into each other. There's no real day or night when you're going from mission to mission, when it doesn't matter if a base blows up at night or if a transport troop gets wiped out at noon. I'm gonna have to admit that if it weren't for the chronometers constantly ticking in Deathscythe, it would've been real easy for me to forget what day it was.  
  
But it happens, I suppose. It was kind of a mixed blessing though. Yeah, going all fuzzy and not being able to remember that you ate the same thing for breakfast for a week straight was weird, but at least you weren't constantly freaking out about watching your back. It sorta sucks, now that I think about it, because all I can really remember from the war is all the big stuff. The battles, the missions, all the important things I can recite off the top of my head, damn near like a recording. But I couldn't tell you all the places I stayed, the people I met, what the weather was like on the day that I--  
  
I'm getting ahead of myself.  
  
Needless to say, when you're not doing anything but making repairs to your Gundam, there isn't all that much to remember.  
  
So, this wasn't a day that I should have remembered. Nothing important about it whatsoever. Except that it does stick out in my head. Not 'cuz it was some big turning point in the war, but because the day was important to me.  
  
He was there, too, you know. Well, I suppose it's sort of obvious. I mean, he *was* my partner and all. We'd been hopping schools and running missions almost nonstop together, so I don't think I have to mention that he was there with me on the forgettable day.  
  
Oh, and we were together by then, too.  
  
Yeah, like *together* together.  
  
Well, there isn't really much to say about that, either. First it was a hormones thing. Hell, we were mutually attracted. Okay, I was more attracted than he was at first, but I made him change his tune real quick. So we... you know. Then it turned into a sort of comfort thing. An understanding thing. We were together so much. We knew what the other was doing. We knew immediately when something went wrong on a mission. We watched each other's backs and tended to each other's wounds. So it stopped being about hormones and started being about... being there. About having a place, a warm pair of arms to crawl into at night when the screams were echoing in your ears or the nightmares refused to let you go.  
  
No, it wasn't some dumb-ass fairy tale story about love at first sight and unrequited feelings and all that shit. We knew what we were doing. Well, mostly I did, at least for the first bit. It's after the hormones-thing that our relationship started getting a bit weird and murky. Hey, everyone I'd been close to has died. Cut me a break, okay? I knew as much about caring as he did, so it really was the blind leading the blind. But it turned out okay... eventually.  
  
Because around the time that we started figuring things out -- mind you, this was in between the times when we were running missions, and killing people, and blowing up bases, and generally trying to destroy a megalomaniacal world power -- things changed again. The loneliness started creeping up on us. The hunger. The ache. Whatever you wanna call it. That *feeling* hit us both like sledgehammers.   
  
Damn distracting thing.   
  
Do you know how hard it is to set C-4 properly when all you can think about is deep blue eyes and strong arms?  
  
Yeah, I figured.  
  
So now, everything was changing *again*. We damn near didn't make it the first time things changed between us. We both started to ignore the problem, just sorta slid around it and buried it in the corner and tried not to think about it.   
  
It didn't work.  
  
So, on this unremarkable, forgettable day, I was up to my elbows in lubricant, tinkering with my partner. Uh, Deathscythe, I mean. Don't look at me like that. I know what I'm talking about. I was making some adjustments to the systems, mostly just general fiddling so I *wouldn't* think about what I shouldn't be thinking about. Busy hands, you know. I was doing a pretty damn good job of it until he walked right into the warehouse. And immediately it was like everything faded out and all I could see was him, just standing there on the oil-stained concrete, watching me as I hung half in and half out of my Gundam.   
  
I suppose you could say that my whole world suddenly turned into nothing but him. That he was my sole reason for living. That there were rose petals floating through the air and violin music playing in the background. It would be a lie, but you could say it.  
  
Instead, I hauled myself out of the innards of my suit and rubbed the back of my hand across my nose. Later I would find out that I left a *huge* grease stain across damn near half my face, but that's not important right now. Grabbing the winch, I slipped my foot in the strap and lowered myself back down to ground level.  
  
"Yo, Heero! What's up?" I called out, still swinging twelve feet from the ground.  
  
He waited until my feet had touched the concrete floor. Then he stalked over (not walked, he never *just* walked; he always moved with a sort of determined purpose that made people get out of his way) and grabbed my arms in both of his, and... looked at me. We were practically face to face, and he's just a *bit* taller than I am, so I had to look up to read the intense expression in his eyes. He leaned in *just* that much closer, and I licked my lips, and I could feel his breath across my cheek.  
  
I'll never forget what he said next.  
  
"Duo... you've got grease all over your face."  
  
I sorta lost it at that moment, shoving out of Heero's arms and leaving a big, black grease stain on his tank top in my wake. I walked over to the toolbox and yanked out a rag, scrubbing at my face with it.  
  
"Jeeze, Heero!" I complained loudly, the note of sarcasm finding its way easily into my voice, "Nice thing to say. You're a real romantic, you know that?"  
  
Heero just smirked at me, reached over and grabbed the rag out of my hands. He also pulled out a half-empty bottle of water and soaked the rag. He started to wipe my face down with it, but before I could complain, he beat me to it.  
  
"You're just smearing the grease around. You should really take a shower. And use the *good* soap."  
  
I'm pretty sure that I started to make threats on Heero's life by this point. I can't really remember because a wet and greasy rag was being swiped rather roughly across my face. Finally Heero stopped, pitching the rag with perfect aim at the toolbox.   
  
"Heh. Am I good enough for you now, Heero?" I blew a raspberry at him, hands coming up to rest at my hips.   
  
Heero just looked at me, his blue eyes holding a hint of amusement.  
  
"I love you, you know," he said, in exactly the same voice he had used to tell me that I was covered in grease.  
  
I stared at him, my hands falling limp at my sides.  
  
The look in Heero's eyes wavered and his gaze moved off to someplace over my right shoulder. "Is that okay with you?"  
  
I just sort of nodded. Then my words came back to me and the best I could say was, "Yeah, it's okay."   
  
And it was.  
  
But Heero was still looking at me (or more precisely, over my right shoulder), like he was waiting for something. I nearly smacked myself when I realized what he was waiting for.  
  
"Oh! I'm such an idiot. I love you, too." Heero finally returned his gaze back to my face but there was a sort of calculating look in his eyes, like he didn't quite trust what I was saying. It was also mixed with this sad, yearning look, like what I said hadn't been good enough. I blew him another raspberry. "Oh, gimme a break, Heero! I've never said I loved anyone before! You sorta laid it on me pretty heavy, you know. Forgive me for being somewhat shocked and amazed."  
  
Heero's answer was a slight smile before he got a confused look on his face. "Is this where we say that we will love each other forever?"  
  
This time I *did* smack myself.  
  
"What the hell kind of question is that, Yuy?!"  
  
Heero just shrugged. "I have never confessed my love to anyone either. I was under the impression that most lovers expressed wishes and feelings of forever and eternity with each other at this stage of the relationship."  
  
I really didn't know what to say to that. So, I did the next best thing. I walked over to Heero (yeah, I'm just a walker, people don't get out of my way like they do for him) and pulled him into my arms. We stood there on the stained concrete just... holding each other.   
  
Finally, I lifted my head from Heero's shoulder and looked into his eyes.   
  
"I don't want forever." Before Heero could say anything and to make sure that damned rejected look didn't come into his eyes again, I continued. "I mean, who wants forever, anyway? After you live for a while and see everything there is to see, wouldn't life get boring? All the same stuff, day after day? I don't want you to promise me forever. I don't want to see you break your promise."  
  
Strong arms tightened around my waist, pulling me closer. "Then what do you want me to promise?"  
  
I thought about it.  
  
I didn't want forever. I'd lost too many people before, good people who'd promised to always be there for me before they were taken away. And, dammit, this was a war! There was no way in hell I could promise Heero forever in return, not if I was piloting Deathscythe. But it also seemed sort of cheap, to only say 'I love you' and expect to have everything turn out okay. I sighed and tightened my hold around Heero's shoulders, trying to bury myself in his embrace. So, what did I want from him? Did I want anything at all besides what he'd already given me? I looked him straight in the eye, my voice steady and serious.  
  
"Just give me today, Heero. Just promise me that you'll love me today."  
  
Heero nodded. "If you'll do the same."  
  
I grinned up at him, unable to keep the happiness out of my voice. "I promise that I'll love you today, Heero Yuy. And I'll make sure you believe it tonight!"  
  
And I started to laugh in Heero's arms. At least, I was laughing until he grabbed me by the chin and kissed me. By this time the sun had set and after a shower I made good on my promise to Heero.  
  
So, all in all, it was a pretty regular day. Nothing much happened that day that didn't happen every day for a long time now. Ah, great! The coffee's ready. And just in time, too, 'cuz I think I hear someone coming down the hallway.  
  
"Good morning, sleepy head! Figures it always takes the smell of coffee to pull your carcass out of bed."  
  
"Hn. Good morning, Duo. I promise that I'll love you today."  
  
  
  
  
  
-- Owari -- 


End file.
